what is it?

'to care, to devote you all, to commit yourself and love unconditionally'

is that it? or is it what we've been told to believe?
either way, I honestly am starting to not believe it. I'm beginning to think it's all a lie. I think that kind of love, true love, is starting fade away. I even have doubts that it even exists.

Maybe, as a teenager, we'd think love is found in the opposite gender – to feel whole when he/she's around, to constantly think about your partner every day, to want more from every moment spent, to dream and fantasize about the future together: 'our' house, 'our' kids, 'our' life.

...but as this teen grows up, doesn't this idea of love change? it does. doesn't it? won't he/she respond 'that love is just puppy love' when asked? won't this mean that the love now isn't what we thought it would be initially? does that imply that the feeling of whenever you wake up every morning next to your lover isn't the same as how you initially thought it would feel like? does it?!
whenever I see married couples; husband and wife, mother and father, I don't see the 'sparkle' whenever they look at each other's eyes. None. Not even one couple. Not even the recently married couples I know. Not even–

...
I don't know what to think anymore. I don't know what to believe anymore.
someone should stop the media from confusing how we humans see 'reality' as, how I see reality, I guess.

I guess I'm thinking too much, but these questions are starting to confuse me, it's starting to make my chest ache. what if–

(sigh)
if only a guy could end this overflow of never-ending questions in my head.

白痴-笨蛋!
is there such a guy that exists? a guy who will care, devote his all, commit himself and love unconditionally - just for the girl he 'loves'? as much as I want to believe in that, I doubt it.
I'll only believe it when I see it.

Until then, true love.. there's no such thing.

29.